halfway to elderly
So, I turned 30 today. A lot of people dread turning 30, but I honestly wasn't. I'm actually excited about it because now I feel like an official adult.
I've always said that I was going to join a gym at age 30, because I knew that the most fabulous perk of being a 20-something is the free pass to eat Doritos with every meal, guzzle cheap booze, and sit around watching a lot of Rosanne reruns. If I'm ever going to look like Madonna by age 40, I figure I better start at age 30 and give myself the decade of lead time to get in shape. If I had money and trainers and my own gym (and Guy Richie), then I could start at 35. But my apartment barely holds a couch, no less an elliptical machine.
So now that I am actually 30, I've decided to nix the whole gym idea. Too sweaty, too costly, and there really isn't a gym located in a convenient spot for me. Besides, this is California! There's a yoga joint on every block. It's always warm out (comparatively) and I've got three parks in my neighborhood, each with hills that are steep like walls. Just walking down the street to buy a six-pack has me nearly in cardiac arrest.
So my new resolution is this: for my 60th birthday, I'm going to join a basketball team.
I've always said that I was going to join a gym at age 30, because I knew that the most fabulous perk of being a 20-something is the free pass to eat Doritos with every meal, guzzle cheap booze, and sit around watching a lot of Rosanne reruns. If I'm ever going to look like Madonna by age 40, I figure I better start at age 30 and give myself the decade of lead time to get in shape. If I had money and trainers and my own gym (and Guy Richie), then I could start at 35. But my apartment barely holds a couch, no less an elliptical machine.
So now that I am actually 30, I've decided to nix the whole gym idea. Too sweaty, too costly, and there really isn't a gym located in a convenient spot for me. Besides, this is California! There's a yoga joint on every block. It's always warm out (comparatively) and I've got three parks in my neighborhood, each with hills that are steep like walls. Just walking down the street to buy a six-pack has me nearly in cardiac arrest.
So my new resolution is this: for my 60th birthday, I'm going to join a basketball team.
posted by Freewendy @ 8:14 PM
1 Comments:
At 12:48 PM,
Jefferson said…
Your workout routine:
Crunches: bundle all Wendy Magazines, place them on your chest and do crunches. Add additional magazines as they are published.
Squat Thrusts/Walks: Stand in bedroom. Lift Wendy C. and carry her to the livingroom. Turn and walk back to bedroom. Don't drop Wendy C.
Curls: Hold a can of Del Monte Spaghetti Sauce(it's not like you're going to eat it) in each hand. Curl them up from your thighs to your shoulders then slowly let them fall.
Upside-down Margarita Leg Lifts: Sit on a barstool with the back of your head on the edge of the bar. Have someone pour a margarita into your mouth. While this is happening, lift your legs and hold them straight out. After you swallow, lower your legs. Do 10 sets.
Cardio: Walk around your neighborhood for 30 minutes, 3 times a week.
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