what the hell is donut beer, anyway?
By Nigel Morphine, correspondent
Wendy Mag correspondent Nigel Morphine was asked by the Editors to go to an Arlington, Virginia establishment called Dr. Dremo’s and try the advertised “donut beer.” Mr. Morphine outsourced this tasting experiment to 2 consultants. After a strict selection process was followed and a generous consultant rate was agreed upon, the publisher of Wendy Mag and his wife were chosen as the judges. To protect their identities we will refer to them only as “Consultant 1” and “Consultant 2.” The tasting was observed & recorded by Mr. Morphine.
Consultant 1 : [smelling the beer] Smells like cream soda. Or is that creem soda? Or kreem soda? A little like Newcastle Brown in color. Caramel.
Consultant 2: High notes of a glazed donut.
C1: Tastes like a slightly bitter cream soda.
C2: It’s like beer in the beginning, but cream soda towards the end. A chocolatey aftertaste.
C1: OK, I agree. Kind of. It’s not representative of a chocolate donut. It’s not opaque. It should be thicker if they want us to think of it as the beverage equivalent of a chocolate donut. It’s Tootsie Roll chocolate, not donut chocolate. It’s more of a glazed donut with chocolate frosting, not a cakey chocolate donut.
C2: I can taste it being a chocolate cake donut. Caramelly.
C1: …
C2: Lately my burps taste like burnt bacon.
C1: What, from the beer?
C2: No, I don’t know why. They just do. I think I’ll ask my doctor about it.
C1: Is it gross?
C2: No, I don’t mind.
Final verdict: donut beer, while gimmicky, is bearable & will get you drunk, but it doesn’t necessarily taste of donut. And if you did a shot of Kahlua before drinking it, it wouldn’t be like coffee & donuts. Except in theory.
Wendy Mag correspondent Nigel Morphine was asked by the Editors to go to an Arlington, Virginia establishment called Dr. Dremo’s and try the advertised “donut beer.” Mr. Morphine outsourced this tasting experiment to 2 consultants. After a strict selection process was followed and a generous consultant rate was agreed upon, the publisher of Wendy Mag and his wife were chosen as the judges. To protect their identities we will refer to them only as “Consultant 1” and “Consultant 2.” The tasting was observed & recorded by Mr. Morphine.
Consultant 1 : [smelling the beer] Smells like cream soda. Or is that creem soda? Or kreem soda? A little like Newcastle Brown in color. Caramel.
Consultant 2: High notes of a glazed donut.
C1: Tastes like a slightly bitter cream soda.
C2: It’s like beer in the beginning, but cream soda towards the end. A chocolatey aftertaste.
C1: OK, I agree. Kind of. It’s not representative of a chocolate donut. It’s not opaque. It should be thicker if they want us to think of it as the beverage equivalent of a chocolate donut. It’s Tootsie Roll chocolate, not donut chocolate. It’s more of a glazed donut with chocolate frosting, not a cakey chocolate donut.
C2: I can taste it being a chocolate cake donut. Caramelly.
C1: …
C2: Lately my burps taste like burnt bacon.
C1: What, from the beer?
C2: No, I don’t know why. They just do. I think I’ll ask my doctor about it.
C1: Is it gross?
C2: No, I don’t mind.
Final verdict: donut beer, while gimmicky, is bearable & will get you drunk, but it doesn’t necessarily taste of donut. And if you did a shot of Kahlua before drinking it, it wouldn’t be like coffee & donuts. Except in theory.
posted by Freewendy @ 5:06 PM
1 Comments:
At 11:27 AM,
Anonymous said…
I'm still waiting for someone to somehow mix alcohol with used deep fat fryer grease to make a REAL donut beer. Just don't ask me to drink it. That's what consultants are for.
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